2015 was a pretty good year for the Martins, no crazy big accomplishments but no low spots either...until right at the end. The best part of 2015 was the addition of Otto to our little family, and the worst part was this past week when Joe's grandfather passed away. Joe is part of a huge family, his mom is one of nine children and he is one of six with close to 30 first cousins. Grandpa was really the heart of this whole big family so even though he lived a good long 92 years and he's with his wife now, it's still really hard to lose him and it feels like the family has a big hole in the middle where Grandma and Grandpa used to be. Joe took me to meet his grandparents on our third date, because as he put it, "My grandparents are the most important people to me and if they don't like you there's really no point in continuing to date," ...no pressure. Thankfully it went well and after a few games of pitch I won them over, but I knew then just how important Joe's grandparents were to him, so they were important to me too.
Despite our 2015 highs and lows being vastly different experiences, they both taught me the same important lesson: you can't plan for everything. We were not planning to get a puppy when Otto came into our lives. It was something Joe and I had been toying with but I hadn't really gotten him on board and it seemed like there was never a good time. We had stuff scheduled every weekend of the summer, Not every trip is conducive to bringing a puppy, and you also can't necessarily leave your brand new puppy at a kennel. But, the last weekend in July, Otto just kind of fell into our laps and with about 12 hours notice we had a new puppy! We didn't know much about him and when we took him to the vet we found out he was only 3 weeks old. Not only did he need to be bottle fed every 4 hours, but that also meant it would be weeks before he could get his shots and go to any kind of boarding facility for an overnight. Thankfully we were able to bring the little pup with us on pretty much all of our planned weekend getaways for the rest of the summer, but it was funny how Otto became more important than plans that had been in our calendar for months pretty much overnight.
Anyone that knows Joe and I well knows that we live by our calendar. Ask us to do anything and we will immediately need to consult the calendar to see if we have anything planned (and if you're giving us less than 3 months notice chances are we're already booked). We also tend to average 5 weddings a year...and 5 bridal showers, 5 bachelorette parties, and 5 bachelor parties. Our families keep asking us when our wedding schedule will slow down, "Aren't all your friends married yet? You guys are constantly going to weddings!" But, I absolutely love weddings and each and every one we get invited to I feel honored that we get to be involved in the most important day of two of our friends' lives. Our last wedding of 2015 fell on New Year's Eve, and Joe was a Groomsman in this wedding for his high school friend. We had it in the calendar for months and planned our whole holiday schedule around it, but we certainly couldn't foresee and didn't plan for Grandpa's passing. When someone important to you dies, everything else stops and everything else you had written in your schedule suddenly doesn't matter...unless the other thing you have in your calendar is a wedding that you can't cancel or reschedule. The wake and funeral were back to back on the 30th, so we had to go straight from the funeral to the rehearsal dinner. At least we were able to make both but we knew we certainly wouldn't be in the most festive mood on our friends' rehearsal dinner...which is supposed to be a happy occasion. As if all this wasn't enough, the night before the funeral Joe got hit with a stomach bug and the poor guy was up sick all night. On top of what was already a long day, he had maybe about 2 hours of sleep and the poor guy was sick as a dog. He's a trooper and he made it through the whole day. By wedding day he was feeling better and we were thinking we were going to have a pretty good day at the wedding...then about halfway through the reception I started to feel sick so we left a little earlier than planned and by 11:00pm I was in full stomach bug mode myself. Needless to say this was absolutely not how we planned on ringing in the new year, but this is life and at least we have each other to make it through. (Also...if you get sick...we are so sorry!)
No matter how much we plan and schedule, you can't control sickness or death and when those things happen, it really puts life into perspective. Often what seemed so important when you put it in your calendar, suddenly doesn't matter when something truly important happens. Plans can be re-scheduled and friends will understand, but also every single day of our lives doesn't need to be planned in a calendar. It's really OK to leave a day empty every now and then. I really hate bailing on anything that I have committed to; once it's in the calendar I feel like I signed my name in blood that I will attend. But life is unpredictable at times and maybe I need to learn to be more flexible in my own scheduling and more understanding of my friends when their schedules change as well. All in all, we had a very good 2015 and in 2016 I will only try to be less rigid with the schedule and more open to change.
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